NO MORE ACT OF ASS JUDGES
What were we thinking when we passed the Act of Ass Judges?!?! That stupid Act of Ass Judges is threatening our democracy, by taking away our constitutional right to judge asses for ourselves. Instead of democratically judging asses, we have these unelected, unaccountable judges out there judging all of our asses. If we don't get rid of the Act of Ass Judges, whose ass do you think they are going to judge next? You might think, "Not mine" but you don't know that for certain. They're probably rubbing their sweaty little palms together at the thought of judging your ass.
I JUST DON'T THINK We NEED TO GIVE EVERY NOMINEE AN UP OR DOWN BOAT
I guess I'm not really clear on why we need to give each nominee an up or down boat. I don't really see what up or down boats have to do with this whole thing. And, while I am ardent supporter of boating and enjoy it very much, handing out up or down boats seems like a serious waste of money to me.
Also, I will confess my ignorance as to what exactly an up or down boat is. Maybe you mean a Guppy or Dhow boat? But those aren't even really comparable. A guppy is like a 2 person cruiser and a dhow is a chiefly Middle Eastern sailbaot. Or is it "a Cup or dhow boat"? If that's what you mean, then I would infer that by "Cup boat" you mean America's cup, but this is completely ludicrous. An America's Cup class boat costs like $3-4 million just to build. Why would you even suggest that every nominee deserve a world class racing yacht? I bet there's nominees that can't even swim, much less skipper a 75 foot long boat. It's just stupid to give them it. And what about maintaining a boat crew of 16 (that doesn't include the staff that stays on land)? Should we foot the bill for that, too? Give me a friggin break. In fact, I'm going to take an extreme view: no nominee should ever be getting a Cup or dhow boat. None of them. Ever.
