Then you - bananaphone - say, oh dang, I want to be friends with ihateprimates. Then you email me and say, "Hey guy, I want to be friends with ihateprimates. My name is bananaphone." I respond: "Okay bananaphone, that is cool. Friendships are important. I'll check with ihateprimates."
Then I email ihateprimates: "Hey guy, bananaphone wants to be friends with you. Is that cool or not?" Then he responds: "Cool" or maybe "Not so cool. One time, bananaphone peed on my couch when he was drunk. I don't want to be friends with a pee guy."
Here's where things get complicated, okay? Pay attention. If it's cool that you are friends, then I'm like "Hello bananaphone! You and ihateprimates are friends." Then on your webpages (geocities.com/newsocialnetwork/bananaphone .html - the one with your picture, the one I made) I put up a thing that says, "bananaphone is friends with ihateprimates." And also on ihateprimates webpage (geocities.com/newsocialnetwork/ihateprimates.html) I put a thing that says "ihateprimates is friends with banaphone." Oh, I almost forgot. There will be links, too. So you can click on the thing that says "friends with bananaphone" and it will take you directly to bananaphone's page.
Okay, but if it's the other case - the one where you pee on the guy's couch - then I send a sort of sly or devious, but nice email to you and say, "I don't think you really want to be friends with him. I saw him stealing a juice. He's just not a good guy. You are friends with me, though. We do not need him." Okay? It's like "You guys aren't friends." but in a way that's not all "U R SUCH A LUZER!" so no bad feelings.
All right, that's the friends part of it. Then there's the announcing shit part of it. That's where you email me and say, "I got something to say!" And then you, bananaphone, say something like "Today I ate a pile of grapes and went to the zoo. I saw a penguin." Then I update your page to say that. It's your message. I won't update it with things you don't say.
People will like this because when they are friends, then they can send a message to me that says "Hey, I want to send a message to sexualhealing9999, that says: Hi, I want to meet for tea and talk" then I'll send a message to their friend to say that. let's pretend it's bananaphone that says that (he's a pee guy, so he's not friends with ihateprimates, but sexualhealing9999 is okay with pee guys). Then sexualhealing9999 can send me a mesage back that says, "Ok." I send that message to bananaphone. Then when they meet for tea and talking, then they can say, "Hey we're friends. My name is bananaphone." And when someone, probably like the waiter or someone, says "Do you 2 know each other?" And they say, "Yes, we are friends. Have you heard of geocities.com/newsocialnetwork/index.html? My name is bananaphone. This is sexualhealing9999." Then the waiter will join and have 2 friends and that will be growth for the company.
I would say that after a while I might hire some of my actual friends to help me answer emails and send out emails and let people down in case they don't want to be friends.
I have to say that this is all on the internet and with computers, too. You need to have a computer to do this, or you can borrow a friend's computer. We will not pressure people into buying their own computer so they can make friends on our social network. We are not a high pressure company.
The presentation is now over and that's my idea. Now I have a question: when you give $10 million do you give it in cash or is it a check or do I send you my bills and parking tickets and then you pay them for me?
