Kid Tetris

I've had hotel breakfast bars that ranged from pretty good to really awful and my current hotel has an awful one. Namely because it's small and everything is a fucking pastry. Even the muffins. Especially the muffins. They aren't muffins. They are cupcakes. The batter is, very clearly, a dense pound cake batter. What's sad is that they use this for all their cupcakes. The way their cupcakes are differentiated is by sprinkling crap on top - poppy seeds, miniature chocolate ships, some red crap that actually does go through the batter and makes it look like someone used the cupcake to catch the blood from a stab wound. All in all, these are possibly the worst muffins in the world, because they ARE NOT MUFFINS AT ALL.

For a good time, listen in on a technology company's quarterly results conference call. In the Q&A section when they open up the lines, you'll hear AIM windows burping with messages and Outlook email notificates. It's crazy fun. Also, you'll learn something about business maybe.

The world's best restaurant in Orlando - Le Coq au Vin. I like French cooking to begin with (who doesn't? it's full of butter and deliciousness) - I've only had a few bad meals at French restaurants ("rustic Italian" restaurants are much closer to 50%). But this is one of the best meals I've ever had. It's a food experience. But it's kind of casually elegant, so you aren't uncomfortable - like an illiterate guy selling encyclopedias or something.

I had a prix fixe tasting menu. I like these, because the chef tends to be a little more adventurous and, as its name would suggest, I can try a lot of things. Plus wine pairings are usually built in, so you can get to try 2 or 3 or 4 different wines without pretending you know anything about wine. Here's a wine tip, though: if you try ice wine, you will like it. A lot. And you will drink a lot of it. That's why it's expensive and comes in small bottles - to keep you from drinking yourself to death.

Also, for a good time, you can find something by the band Essex Green.